I have been sufficiently reproofed by Paul for my last post. Apparently seriousness doesn't suit me as well as feeble attempts to address the mundane with quipy comic relief. Although to my defense, Lillian was watching 'signing time' and was verbally engaged with the characters as well as a fascinating plastic cookie, dogs were barking, and I was over-taxed in a sleep deprivation sort of way. So, on to my serious thoughts from the past weeks, without the diversions.
Have you ever wanted to be raw? It has been the desire of my heart to be the allegorical ground meat before the Lord and in life. You can do just about anything with ground meat. Hamburgers, a curry dish, pizza, or meat balls with a zesty sauce made unpredictably with grape jelly. It is the proverbial putty in your culinary hands. My heart has acknowledged a need to return to this state before God, my mind has conceded a weakness in it's pliability, and my body is still recovering from being pregnant. Whether by need or current reality, I desire to go back to my spiritual and physical beginnings and rebuild with stronger materials. So, I am going public with my goals, and plan to blog the eventual progress, and present battle with my reconstruction project.
I already have a firm foundation. Christ is my God, but I want Him to be Lord of my moments. So goal #1 rises from this necessity. Each day is the Lords. Not Mine. Not Lillian's. Not Paul's. Not my dogs. Where is the Application? I'll start with 'may the words of my mouth and meditations of my heart be pleasing in your sight oh Lord,my Rock and my Redeemer.'~Proverbs 19:14. My back up plan is Proverbs 19: 13: 'Keep your servant from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then will I be blameless, innocent of great transgression.' If honesty isn't too much, I will bare the shame of openly admitting I battle willful sins. My heart is obstinate in theory and action. With trepidation I have begun praying the Lord would rip it from me. Not fear of God Himself, but with angst that I know He will follow through to perfect me into a glorifying image of himself, and the refining process is at times costly; emotionally, physically, and even socially.
Goal #2 gets physical. Pre-pregnancy body! I have found that gaining 50 extra lbs can take a mild tole on a body, specifically mine. This goal is financially practical in that I can't afford to buy an entire new wardrobe, and therefor need to resort to all the wonderful clothes I could fit into before my Lillian. Really I'm just jumping the band-wagon and being 'green'. It's also pre-emptive,in the hopeful case of another pregnancy (eventually), where I can be fit enough to continue running through the second trimester. This is assuming that typical pregnancy discomforts allow for such a feat. Such a process would assist in avoiding another (and incredibly probable) 50 lb weight fluctuation. Main reason? My body is a tool, and when I exercise regularly, I am sharper, more energetic, and even more outgoing. God gave me one body, and despite modern medical marvels (MMM's for those in the know) we only get one body, minus a part or two. I am honoring God by being a diligent steward of EVERYTHING He has blessed me with, even my stretch marks.
I am certain more goals will be noted, as well as a clearer definition of the first two, but for now I am late for my workout. Ahhh, to be strong enough for regular push-ups again...
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